12/10/19: It’s official. Democrats in the House of Representatives have drawn up two articles of impeachment against the President of the United States.
Donald takes the news badly. By the time the sun rises over D.C. on Tuesday, “Fat Nixon” is already up and tweeting. At 7:37 a.m., perhaps holding out hope against hope, he tap-taps:
To
Impeach a President who has proven through results, including producing perhaps
the strongest economy in our country’s history, to have one of the most
successful presidencies ever, and most importantly, who has done NOTHING wrong,
is sheer Political Madness! #2020Election
Okay, he clearly doesn’t understand how impeachment works (see: Bill Clinton and the booming economy of the 90s).
Then reality strikes! Chairman Jerry Nadler of the House Judiciary Committee announces the charges. There are two: “abuse of power” and “obstructing Congress.”
Fat Nixon melts down.
9:56 a.m.:
Nadler just said that I
“pressured Ukraine to interfere in our 2020 Election.” Ridiculous, and he knows
that is not true. Both the President & Foreign Minister of Ukraine said,
many times, that there “WAS NO PRESSURE.” Nadler and the Dems know this, but
refuse to acknowledge!
9:56
a.m. (twenty-five seconds later): WITCH HUNT!
10:07 a.m.:
Shifty Schiff, a totally
corrupt politician, made up a horrible and fraudulent statement, read it to
Congress, and said those words came from me. He got caught, was very
embarrassed, yet nothing happened to him for committing this fraud. He’ll
eventually have to answer for this!
10:10 a.m.: Read the Transcripts! “us” is a reference to USA, not me!
Then,
fittingly, Trump goes dead on Twitter. He has a meeting scheduled with an old
friend, Sergei Lavrov, the Minister of Foreign Affairs for the Russian Federation.
Rumor has it, they’re going to raise the flag of friendship over the White
House when the meeting ends. A collaboration in 2016 brought victory to Trump
and Putin alike. Now to recapture the magic in 2020!
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Nixon might relate. |
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