12/22/17: As
another Christmas approaches, Fox News fans – and we do include the
Groper-in-Chief – are still fighting the bloody “War on Christmas.”
Once again, millions of “good
Americans” (defined by Trump as “people who love Trump”) will be killed or
divested of appendages by toppling, blinking-light-and-ornament-encumbered pine
trees.
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Is a greeting of "Merry Christmas" appropriate here? |
Alien
wise men visiting the earth via U.F.O.’s.
So, let me be the first liberal
to say to Trump fans: “Merry Christmas! Merry, Mary, Jesus, Joseph, Lazarus (no
Obamacare for you), and everybody else in the New Testament, Christmas!”
This greeting does not go out to
any of my Jewish friends – Muslim friends – or friends who might be agnostic or
atheist or Hindu or Scientologists, so that sometimes I just say, “Happy
Holidays.” This is not because I want to see Christians crushed by toppling
trees, but because I try to be polite. I don’t assume everyone believes what I
believe or what my Christian friends believe. And it might seem insensitive to
assume Tom Cruise believed in Jesus instead of the holiday story once told by
L. Ron Hubbard about alien wise men visiting the earth via U.F.O.’s.
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