11/20/17: The President decides to save the elephants after his administration decides to kill the elephants.
In an effort to cut down on pesky regulations, the federal government announces that big game hunters will be allowed to bring back trophies from exotic African hunts. This will include various elephant parts. The National Rifle Association supports the change, saying it would be a “signficant step forward in having hunting receive the recognition it deserves as a tool of sound wildlife management.”
(Yes, sound management: for example, the history of the
American bison, c. 1873, or the carrier pigeon, 1914.)
This policy change is so terrible – the logic so absurd – even Laura Ingraham on Fox News can’t choke it down. When other Fox commentators criticize the change, Trump realizes that if Fox can’t go along with such stupidity, he might be wise to look at the new policy for the first time.
This “horror story,” he suddenly exclaims,
must be stopped! Trump saves the elephants from Trump.
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Don Jr. saving an elephant by shooting an elephant. It all makes so much sense! |
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