October 20, 2021: Rep. Matt Gaetz and His Creepy Friend

10/20/21: Congressman Gaetz stopped sneering (see: 10/19/21) Wednesday and rose in the House chamber to offer a stunning claim. “I think someone may be trying to kill me,” he said. “If they are successful, I would like my constituents and my family to know who stopped their arrest.” 

Just because he has creepy friends, that doesn't mean Gaetz is guilty.

Rep. Gaetz explained that he had received a threat on Twitter from a professed professional hitman. That hitman had traveled to Washington D.C. to carry out his attack. (You almost think Gaetz might change his mind and come out in favor of some kind of gun control, as a result.) 

In any case, he wanted everyone to know that if he were to be slaughtered, it would be the fault of the Department of Justice, which had declined to arrest the man responsible for the Twitter threat. 

Now, as much as we at this blog believe Gaetz is a terrible person, we absolutely do not want to see him gunned down, bludgeoned to death with a shovel, or cut up with carving knives. We hope Rep. Gaetz remains safe and snug in his bed. 

Sans girls of a minor age, of course.

 

If you haven’t been following that story, Gaetz may well be trying to deflect attention away from his friendship with that other terrible person, and possible pea-in-the pod Joel Greenberg. 

On Monday, Politico reported: that Greenberg, described aptly as a “corrupt former Florida tax official and one-time ‘wingman’ to Rep. Matt Gaetz,” was able to gain extra time before he was sentenced to jail. Mr. Greenberg, Politico explains, has been cooperating “with federal prosecutors in their investigation of the congressman and a host of other scandals.” 

Greenberg has already plead guilty to half-a-dozen felonies, including trafficking underage girls for sex. Prosecutors asked U.S. District Judge Gregory Presnell to delay sentencing “so they can track down all of the leads Greenberg” has provided.

 

“Mr. Greenberg was a prolific criminal,” Assistant U.S. Attorney Roger Handberg explained in seeking delay. 

“Mr. Greenberg was not alone. This is an unusual situation in the number of different investigations and lines of investigation we are pursuing,” Handberg said, adding that the extra time was required “because of the need to follow up on some of these leads.”

 

The biggest prize for federal prosecutors is Gaetz, who was not mentioned in court Monday and is under investigation on suspicion he paid to have sex with a 17-year-old girl to whom Greenberg had introduced him in 2017.

 

Rep Gaetz may prove innocent in the end, and he has not yet been charged with any crimes. So we here at this blog are not ready to shout, in the way of Trump’s loyal fans, “Lock him up!” until charges are filed, juries impaneled, cases heard, and verdicts rendered. But we can say, the congressman may have other worries on his mind, besides hitmen, imaginary or real.