If you can watch enough Fox News and convince yourself eight other people, a slew of F.B.I. and Justice Department leaders and countless reporters are liars, whereas Donald J. Trump (a.k.a. "Big Orange Buffoon") is a pillar of virtue, then you might think the president is having a good week.
In reality, it appears we are about to learn that Stormy Daniels is Donald J. Trump with gigantic breasts.
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| Stormy Daniels may be prepared to spill some Trump beans. |
3/20: Tuesday gets off to a bad start when President Buffoon calls Shirtless Strongman Vladimir Putin to
congratulate him on winning an election in which leading opposition candidates
were barred from running.
As we all know by now:
Donald
♥’s
Vladimir
Unfortunately, for the couple, Republican Senator John McCain responds with this harsh assessment:
[A]n American
president does not lead the free world by congratulating dictators on winning
sham elections. And by doing so with Vladimir Putin, President Trump insulted
every Russian citizen who was denied the right to vote in a free and fair
election to determine their country’s future, including the countless Russian
patriots who have risked so much to protest and resist Putin’s regime.
White House Press Liar Sarah Sanders admits later that the Big Orange Buffoon did not bother to mention Russian meddling in the 2016
election or ask about the nerve agent used in an attempted assassination of
a Kremlin critic on British soil.
Apparently, the two pals talked mostly about office pools and March Madness. Putin is picking Trump University to win it all.
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| Donald does love Putin, it would seem; but not as much as Stormy and Karen! |
3/21: John O. Brennan served the
C.I.A. for twenty-five years. He left government service and then
returned, serving as head of the agency from 2013 to 2017. In theory, if you watch a lot of Fox News, at least, Brennan could be just another liar picking
on poor Donald J. Trump. After F.B.I. Deputy Director Andrew
McCabe was fired, late Friday night, March 16 (just 26 hours before he was scheduled to retire), Brennan tweeted this response, aimed at the Big Orange Buffoon:
When the full
extent of your venality, moral turpitude, and political corruption becomes
known, you will take your rightful place as a disgraced demagogue in the
dustbin of history. You may scapegoat Andy McCabe, but will not destroy
America... America will triumph over you.
So, if you watched Fox, you had to now convince yourself: 1)
McCabe was a liar, out to get Donald; 2) James Comey was a liar; 3) Brennan was also a liar; 4) former Director of National Intelligence James Clapper was a liar, too.
A fifth “liar,” retired four-star General
Barry R. McCaffrey, had harsh words the same day. “Reluctantly,”
he tweeted, “I have concluded that President Trump is a serious threat to US
national security. He is refusing to protect vital US interests from active
Russian attacks. It is apparent that he is for some unknown reason under the
sway of Mr Putin.”
But what does McCaffrey know! All he has are
three Purple Hearts, two Silver Stars for valor, and
two Distinguished Service Crosses to his name.
Brennan attacked Trump again on MSNBC on Tuesday. “I’m saying that perhaps the Russians have something and that’s
why Mr. Trump is concerned,” he told the show’s hosts. He could not say what that
“something” might be, but added, “Mr. Trump knows better than any one of us
whether or not the Russians may have something on him.”
3/22: John Dowd, lead lawyer in the
Buffoon’s dealings with the Mueller investigation, suddenly resigns.
Sources tell reporters Dowd believes he cannot control his client. Trump reportedly believes Mueller is the Anti-Christ.
Sources tell reporters Dowd believes he cannot control his client. Trump reportedly believes Mueller is the Anti-Christ.
I’m joking—but you can believe almost
anything where Trump is involved.
We are then told Dowd’s replacement will be
Joseph diGenova—famous for floating the theory on Fox News that evil forces at
work inside the F.B.I. and Justice Department are working to “frame” Donald J.
Trump.
Ironically, just eleven days earlier, Trump had
used a pair of tweets to attack the fake news people at The New York Times:
The Failing New York
Times purposely wrote a false story stating that I am unhappy with my legal
team on the Russia case and am going to add another lawyer to help out. Wrong.
I am VERY happy with my lawyers, John Dowd,
Ty Cobb and Jay Sekulow. They are doing a great job and.....” “...have shown
conclusively that there was no Collusion with Russia..just excuse for losing.
The only Collusion was that done by the DNC, the Democrats and Crooked Hillary.
The writer of the story, Maggie Haberman, a Hillary flunky, knows nothing about
me and is not given access.
So, now Haberman had lied. That would make Liar #6 (not counting all the liars at the F.B.I. and Justice), if we follow Trump’s
count.
After months of increasing tension, the
Orange Buffoon also decided to replace National Security Advisor H.R.
McMaster.
McMaster first irritated his boss when he said the proof that Russia meddled in
the 2016 election was “incontrovertible.”
And it might be possible, if you have the
attention span of a cocker spaniel that you forget that moment on March
1, when Trump told a spokesman for the National Security Council that any story
about McMaster being replaced was “fake news.” “I was just with President Trump
and H.R. McMaster in the Oval Office,” the spokesman, Michael Anton, said in a
statement provided to reporters.” Trump, Anton added, “told McMaster that he is
doing a great job.”
The situation hardly improved Thursday night.
First, a variety of White House aides told reporters Trump was prepared to sign
the $1.3 trillion omnibus spending bill the next day, and keep the U.S. government
running.
The evening ended with a “bang” (if you will
excuse the word) when Anderson Cooper interviewed Karen McDougal, former
Playboy Playmate of the Year, who explained in great detail that she had had a
ten-month long affair with then Businessman Big Orange Buffoon back in 2006 and
2007. She mentioned that the first time they had sex he offered to pay her,
which took her aback.
She’s sorry now, she told Cooper, sorry she helped Trump cheat on Melania, his third wife. In one creepy exchange
she described being spirited through a back entry, into Trump Tower and ushered
up to Donald and Melania’s penthouse suite. She said it made her feel dirty and
she asked to leave. You wonder: Was Trump going to ask her to be
“intimate,” maybe on his own marital bed? Well, you never know—unless you watch
Fox News. Then you know! The White House denies this affair took place;
but no one in the White House (or on Fox News) can explain why a friend of Donald’s would pay McDougal $150,000 for her story rights and then refuse to publish her tale
just weeks before the 2016 election.
This would make McDougal Liar #7.
3/23: President Trump wakes early. He
watches Fox News. All the Fox pundits and Fox babes are calling the spending
bill terrible.
Trump considers taking decisive action—which apparently he never
thought of doing the night before. “I am considering a VETO of the Omnibus
Spending Bill based on the fact that the 800,000 plus DACA recipients have been
totally abandoned by the Democrats (not even mentioned in Bill) and the BORDER
WALL, which is desperately needed for our National Defense, is not fully funded,”
he tweets.
Congressional leaders are left scrambling to
try to deal with an impending government shutdown. At 11:38 the Buffoon
announces, again via tweet: “News conference at the White House concerning the
Omnibus Spending Bill. 1:00 P.M.”
Get that veto pen ready!!!
No one inside the White House has any idea
what the Buffoon is going to do, including the Buffoon.
Eventually, Trump appears at the podium for a
rambling discussion on why he is going to sign the bill after all, even though the
bill is “ridiculous” and “terrible” and, well, what can he do? He needs the money
to fund the military—which you figure he must have known all along. Well, don’t
blame him for what will soon turn into a huge budget deficit for the coming
fiscal year!
He’s only the president!
What Congress should do, he explains to a
listening nation, is give up the “power of the purse,” and allow him to
line-item veto any elements of any funding legislation he doesn’t personally
like.
Alas, someone needs to explain to poor Donald
that this matter has already been decided by the U.S. Supreme Court. In Clinton v. City of New York (1998), the court considered a law
passed with strong Republican backing in Congress and with approval from President
Billl Clinton, to allow presidents to do just that.
In a 6-3 ruling, the highest court in the
land declared the law unconstitutional.
3/24: Hundreds of thousands of Americans join
the “March for Our Lives” in the nation’s capital on Saturday. They are gathered
to demand action to stem the bloody tide of gun violence that stains this great
nation. There are also “sibling marches” in 800 towns and cities, including
marches in 390 congressional districts across the land. New York City marchers
number 175,000. Paul McCartney is there in remembrance of his friend, John
Lennon, gunned down by an armed psychopath in 1980.
The teenagers who did so much to organize the
marches—and fuel them with passion—lead the way. More than a thousand young
people from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, where the most recent
massacre occurred, attend D.C. events and help fuel the fervor. Survivors of
slaughter speak eloquently. Emma Gonzalez reads the names of the 17 who died at
her school. Then she stands in silence for six minutes and twenty seconds, the exact
time it took for one unbalanced young man, armed with an AR-15, a
military-style weapon designed for battlefield use, to kill or wound 34 of Gonzalez’s
classmates.
34.
Students from across the nation, who have
witnessed the scourge of too many guns play out, also speak up. Edna Chavez,
17, from Manual Arts High School in Los Angeles, tells the crowd about her
brother, Ricardo, who had been shot and killed. “I have learned to duck from
bullets before I learned to read,” she explains. Then she leads the crowd in a
chant: “Ricardo! Ricardo!”
Trevon Bosley, a high school student from
Chicago who had also lost a brother, also talks. “I’m here to speak for those
youth who fear they may be shot while going to the gas station, the movies, the
bus stop, to church or even to and from school,” he says. “I’m here to speak
for those Chicago youth who feel their voices have been silenced for far too
long.” Other marchers in D.C. and at other locations included parents who lost
six-year-old sons and daughters at Sandy Hook in 2012 and Lauren Milgram, 12,
herself a survivor of that heinous
attack.
Martin Luther King Jr.’s granddaughter also steps
up to the mike. “My grandfather had a dream that his four little children would
not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character,”
nine-year-old Yolanda Ree King tells the D.C. crowd. “I have a dream that
enough is enough. That this should be a gun-free world.
“Period.”
That much is a utopian dream—but you can hardly
fail to be impressed with the spirit of these young people who wish to make
America a better, safer place to live. Well: unless you speak for the NRA.
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| Marchers included NBA star Dwayne Wade and Golden State Warriors Coach Steve Kerr. |
The NRA weighed in with this: “Today’s
protests aren’t spontaneous. Gun-hating billionaires and Hollywood elites are
manipulating and exploiting children as part of their plan to DESTROY the
Second Amendment and strip us of our right to defend ourselves and our loved
ones.”
In a video clip released the day before, an
NRA representative, Colion Noir, criticizes the Parkland survivors and what he
describes as “a march for their lies.”
Apparently, the Second Amendment is the only
amendment he actually likes. “To all the kids from Parkland getting ready to
use your First Amendment to attack everyone else’s Second Amendment at your
march on Saturday, I wish a hero like Blaine had been at Marjory Douglas High
School last month.”
Blaine, in this case, would be Blaine
Gaskill, the school resource officer who quickly shot and killed another school
shooter at Great Mills High School in Maryland earlier the same week.
Noir continued angrily, “Because your
classmates would still be alive and no one would know your names. And because
the media would have completely and utterly ignored your story the way they
ignored his.”
You could quickly pick holes in Noir’s
response if you liked. You could start by noting that these kids undoubtedly wish
no one knew their names now—because their names are only known because they
speak for seventeen dead friends. You could also note that none of the leaders
of the “March for Our Lives” were suggesting disarming police. You could even google
“Gaskill” and find 200,000 stories that mentioned him by name. Then you could
mull over the tragedy of Jaelynn
Willey 17, shot in the head and left brain dead by an armed classmate before Officer Gaskill could respond and
ask if perhaps that didn’t actually prove the Parkland survivors had a point.
But you had to stifle the reflex to vomit at
the NRA’s attack on teens who were tired of seeing friends sprawled in puddles
of blood.
They weren’t out to destroy the Second
Amendment any more than teen who know friends who were killed by drunk drivers
want to close down liquor stores and bars just because they argue for stricter
enforcement of drunk-driving laws. They were insisting, by the hundreds of
thousands, that too many Americans with violent tendencies had too easy access
to too many types of weapons.
And, yes, they were exercising their rights.
In Florida there is evidence that the anti-gun-violence
movement organized by young Americans may stir teens to register and vote.
That’s a third right we cherish and we can hope hundreds of thousands of young
people register and then cast their ballots this fall. The NRA might not like
it; but that’s still how democracy works.
3/25: With less than three hours to
go, before Stephanie Clifford (a.k.a. Stormy Daniels) does her interview on 60
Minutes, I check Trump’s Twitter feed. He last tapped away at 8:45 this morning:
“President Donald J. Trump Proclaims March 25, 2018, as Greek Independence Day:
A National Day of Celebration of Greek and American Democracy”
Nothing since.
Oddly enough, the Tweeter-in-Chief, who never
hesitates to insult a perceived enemy, a critic, or those who pose legal impediments—who
likes to label any unflattering story “fake news”—has never yet tweeted about
Stormy.
He has not called her a “liar,” like so many
women who have accused him of sexual assault. He has not taken on her attorney
directly, has not labeled a single appearance by that lawyer or Ms. Clifford
“fake news.”
Something tells me she’s got the goods on the
Big Orange Buffoon; and something tells me the Buffoon is going to be hoping
neither the First Lady nor Barron, his youngest son, tune in tonight.
Daniels might be sporting impressive fake
boobs. It’s starting to look like the seamy story she’ll tell is real news.
The White House denies any affair ever
occurred. That would make her Liar #9 just this week.
Daniels may in fact possess evidence, and possibly
even a dress stained with Donald’s “seed,” that will blow his denials to Kingdom
Cum. True. Stormy is a shameless promoter, a media- saavy performer, a business
person interested only in making a buck and touting her brand. She is, in that
sense, Donald J. Trump’s doppelganger, if Donald J. Trump sported gigantic
boobs.
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| A porn time bomb may be ticking under the Big Orange Buffoon's bed. |
